La Crosse, Wisconsin is a unique and beautiful place. You might be from La Crosse if…
- You’ve ever worn lederhosen non-ironically.
- Sixty degrees in September requires a sweater. Sixty degrees in March requires flip flops and a tee.
- You’re still mourning the widening of West Avenue, due to the loss of Mr. D’s. (Oh, what we wouldn’t give for a bite of that “Presidential” apple fritter big as your head!)
- You know which President tried the apple fritter.
- You’ve cursed at someone for driving straight through an intersection from the left lane.
- You were sad when VH1 cancelled “Off Pitch.”
- You’ve wondered how much water is wasted because of those historic, constantly-running fountains, but you wouldn’t want to lose them.
- Grandad is more than a relative to you.
- You’ve placed a blanket on the grass along the Mississippi in Riverside Park on the Fourth of July.
- You’ve moved a couch or other furniture to Copeland Avenue the last Saturday of September. For a four-hour parade and its aftermath:
- You know the steamboat era is still alive and well.
- You miss the mayor with the top hat who used to ride around town on his scooter.
- Your six pack is bigger than their six pack.
- You believe having to walk more than two blocks represents a “parking problem.”
- You’ve shoveled the snow in front of a neighbor’s house, just because it’s the right thing to do.
- Eating deep-fried oreos in a beer tent in October is swoon-worthy to you. Even better if you’re wearing one glove.
- You’ve posted a snarky comment incognito on the La Crosse Tribune web site. Or read them and wondered what those people do for work.
- You believe The Pearl is the best historic ice cream/candy shop in the world, and you miss seeing Oscar Peterslie working the fountain.
- You’ve eaten a Logger Dog or had your photo taken with Louie.
- You’ve marveled at the beauty of Mary of the Angels Chapel, and you know what the Franciscan Sisters have been doing round the clock for well over 100 years.
- You’ve hiked Hixon. Upper and lower.
- You’ve run out to move your car at midnight so you don’t get a ticket.
- You know that two hours is not enough time to shop, eat and enjoy downtown La Crosse, so you move your car for that as well.
- You know to avoid Taco Bell, the Cass Street Bridge, and the river during and immediately after the May Fly hatch.
- You’ve ordered pizza and beer to your table while watching a second-run movie at the Rivoli.
- You know winter is over when Rudy’s opens.
- You’ve passed through airport security in less than five minutes.
- You know the best hashed browns in town are at Fayze’s.
- You argue about who has the best cheese curds in town. And you have tried all of them.
- You know which news anchor went viral.
- You know the best bar in the world is Bodega because they have more than 400 types of beer.
- You know tavern culture = a real thing, and you’ve taken out-of-town visitors to experience it.
- You drive I-90 sometimes just to see the icicles on the bluffs, the colors in fall or the view of the Mississippi River.
- Some of your friendships exist only because they have a boat.
- You know any event will be successful if Pat Stephens is involved.
- You know “the castle on Cass” is for sale, and you’ve schemed up ways to afford it.
- You don’t wonder why there is a fence around the 10 Commandments.
- You remember that the statue “Le Pinau” caused a ruckus, and you’ve taken a peek at why.
What would you add to the list?
Charish Badzinski is an explorer, food-lover and award-winning travel and food writer. When she isn’t working to build her blog: Rollerbag Goddess Rolls the World, she applies her worldview to her small business, providing strategic communications, media relations and writing support to individuals and organizations.
Find Charish on Twitter: @charishb.
Rollerbag Goddess Rolls the World by Charish Badzinski is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at rollerbaggoddess.wordpress.com.